Adele (South Africa)

It seems my story is in line with a whole bunch of other people’s.

I also grew up in NG Kerk house, though, we didn't pray before meals, or pray before bed. I think my parents were too busy hating each other. My mum started working at the library when I was about 15, so, being an eternal geek before, I spent even MORE time there. Having already devoured Famous Five, and all the sci-fi on offer I started to delve into the non-fiction.

I too, was dropped off at Sunday school to have my soul saved, though I was never christened when I was little. While I had to sit in Sunday school classes hearing how old JC did miracles, my parents did whatever they did then, and it sure wasn't sitting in church! I suspect it was because my Dad wasn't into the whole Christian vibe. From different sources, I heard he was an atheist, others said he just didn't agree with the church. Since he passed on years ago, I guess I will never know.

My road to perdition was filled with a mixture of X Files, Highlander, Metallica and Erich von Daniken, and pure good old feminist rebellion against sexist church/Bible propaganda. Now Erich is hardly the most reliable and/or sane source for universal truths, but, by George, he made a lot more sense than the Big-Guy-in-the-Sky theory.

So, already having a penchant for aliens, and getting a royal kick out of freaking out small town Free State residents, I veered more toward the evidence available to me, than ramblings of people ‘hearing voices’.
For a while, I was quite happy to just not believe in God. Any god. Even though, when your sphincter puckers in distress, you end up calling on whoever might listen!

After going through super crappy times in my young life, I realised, that if I had to make sense of any of it, it was not be found in a church, but within my own grey matter. I studied Hinduism and Buddhism (I realise that Buddhism isn't a real religion), and have decided to just take life teachings that appeal to me. Casting myself at the feet of a porcelain deity doesn't appeal to me either. Neither does giving my hard-earned cash to a clergyman, so he can buy himself a nicer car, and pick up more expensive prostitutes. I do believe, that whatever truth there is or isn't, one won't find it in the pages of any religious book or text. These are at the whim of human interpretation. And I tend to not agree with many humans.

So, what do I believe?

Not in a god with a white beard, living in the sky. Nor an alien spaceship coming to take the worthy to lala-land. Or pretty much any form of heaven or hell. I have long and involved theories, which is a whole conversation on its own. I believe in energy. Any scientist knows that our molecules are in constant motion. I believe, that if you could get your brain to play along, you could do anything. Walk through walls if you like. I believe all things vibrate at their own unique frequency, according to how their molecules fit together. And maybe, if you can understand that somehow, or vibrate at that frequency yourself, you can do whatever. I have no idea how or who. But that’s my theory in any case. I do believe in an awareness, or soul if you will; once again relating to energy.